Trending For Christmas
Cher Père Noël:
I am clearly late to the game sending you my letter with only six days to go 'til Christmas. With so little time left, I'd like to jump right in.
All things considered, I’ve been a decent human this year. Some might even say a good human, especially since the bar has been knocked down a few notches recently.
I brush my teeth most mornings and evenings, I recycle as best I can. I try to catch myself when I get judgy, I lend an ear to my friends in need, and I love with all my heart.
As far as I know, I haven't harassed anyone yet and THAT is a huge success!
I even cleaned between my stove and my fridge, something most people never ever do in their lifetime. Although I should warn you, what I found there will likely discourage a repeat experience.
I don't want to be presumptuous and come across as greedy, but there are a few things I've been keeping my eye on, and even one of these goodies would fill me with joy.
This year has been harsh on many of us, not the least of all me. It’s been filled with natural disasters, the loss of quite a few legends, the exposure of power's nasty rear and other nonsense. I think you'll agree that making even one person's heart full would be a tremendous win for humanity.
Couldn't it be me?
Thank you for continuing your work despite everything else, and for delivering dreams even to those who believe that Santa is the drunk guy in a baggy suit in front of the Walmart.
Be safe, light speed,
Left to right: this modern, stylish wool coat made in France by La Méricaine would be of absolutely no use here in parched LA except for making me very, very happy. I could wrap myself in its lusciousness and pretend that I'm at an upscale hotel in the French Alps watching the snow fall while sipping a cocktail of St Germain, aka "fresh-squeezed fairy juice that needs to go in my mouth right now".
Left: A box of wooden herbal tea (whatever that means) Tisane de la Forêt which, wonder of all wonders, serenades you with the Christmas classic "Oh Holy Night"; the hope is that the music box will give me the final nudge into deep sleep should the tea (or the St Germain) fail to do so.
Right: Sticking with the theme here, this Frosted Forest candle by Dyptique. The fact that I can only buy three of this limited edition makes me want it even more. Something about a unicorn constellation and the smell of fir needles something something. This magical Frosted Forest candle'd better smell like I'm riding bareback on a unicorn in fresh powder snow. In the French Alps. With a bottle of St Germain.
Left: The Sara lamp by Bensimon is pretty damn expensive and is it really worth it? I think so! A cross between mushroom-inspired mid-century design and the Jetsons' home collection, it will look so fetching in my bedroom.
Right: Do you want it to sound fancy and sell fast? Call it Parisian. Works like a charm. I desperately want this Parisian jam (Confiture Parisienne). I heard it's black and based on an obscure oriental recipe. It will taste delicious with the foie gras I won't be eating this Christmas. I don't even know what's in it and I want it. It has a shiny golden jar, and it's black. Like my soul.
Left: What can I say? These Aurélie Bidermann bangles are shiny. They will make sweet sweet music for everyone to hear as I frantically hand gesture while debating highly intellectual issues, such as who between Brigitte Macron and Melania Trump would drink the other under the table in a pub crawl.
Right: Awesome bag made with love by the awesome french sisters at Manufacture Pascal. They also happen to be my cousins. I'm not biased or anything, but their bags are the best-est. I can already see myself parading this one around. And in it, just barely peeking, would be my bottle of St Germain.
Thanks in advance Santa, and a Merry Christmas to All!